one block

choose ONE block and document it for ONE hour.
place: Philadelphia downtown
time: lunch time

Today I read this phrase: "The city gives one the feeling of being at home. We must take the feeling of being at home into exile. We must be rooted in the absence of a place"

I feel my images are about that. About home(less) and exile, place and absence, connection and loneliness in this new global order where tradition, history, speed, poverty and technology co-exist in the same level creating a new order of complexity. The human tension is on the streets, in the faces, inside each gaze. Brain and memory are accelerated trying to follow the dramas of the future, yet struggling with the remote ancient history reflected in the glass of skyscrappers while our image is capture into surveillance cameras. Our world is now linked, we are all connected, says the cell-phone advertisements, one of the biggest industries of the world global market. So, why are we so alone here ? What are the internal effects of the speed of our time ? what can we do with those parts of us that do not show up on screens ?

the impossible map

The impossible map is the result of an assignment: create an index of a personal map.

After all, what is a map ? a way to organize information... How would MY map be... what do I need in my map ?

Usually when people thing about maps, they think about territory, space, the world, a country, a city. But there's so many kinds of maps...

Can our emotions, memories, perceptions be mapped ?

For The impossible map I used a map of the sky, the stars, there's our macro-cosmos. I used the map of shiatsu meridians of the human body, all the energetic channels that connect our internal organs with ourselves and the world. I used a map of the brain, the neurological system who commands our movements, actions, thoughts, memory -- what would we be without memory ? In the upper center I have a picture I took from the airplane, we are inside the clouds, but we can see land, the geography of an unknown place -- we never know exactly where we are when we are in a plane, we are just on the way from point A to point B. At the center (down) I put an image of a microscope, the particles we can't see, the micro world that we are made of. Then I have a map of Philadelphia in the background, that's where I am now. In the corner on the left I have a map from Lisbon, my home town, this map is not detailed, shows some distance, but the blue of the ocean is a strong appeal. In the yellow corner I have the map of the subway of Tokyo, the place where I want to go next, it's a complex world this map, mysterious, full of promise...

dim the light

Trying to dim the light was my weekly performance in daily life situations.

This performance was a crusade against the fluorescent lights in the city. The fluorescent lights are everywhere, impossible to escape from it. All the public places have big and powerful fluorescent lights. The trolley, the subway, the station, the class rooms, the TECC center (a building with 700 computers) ... It's everywhere! In every situation I could, I was asking to dim the lights. Sometimes they said me: "you can not dim, it's on or off" "Then off, please", I said "We can open the curtains", I suggested, "Let's try... Oh, that's so much better" they say and finally they are happy with the change. It's just a small and then so important change.

What happened to natural light ? Why people forgot it ? Why do you close the big windows to switch on fluorescent lamps ? There's too much light in our eyes, too much screens, too much. The excess of light and information will turn us all blind. Not sensitive to our surroundings. All the time plugged into machines. Before I didn't had internet at home, and now, I feel the effect of the wireless internet, all the wireless machines I use. I feel weak, tired, my head is about to explode. My eyes hurt so much. I have to close them, do not look, do not watch. When I arrive home I light just a small candle. Sometimes I light the fireplace. Even if it is a gas fake fireplace, it feels good to look at the movement of the fire.

We need to rest our eyes. I want to go to the ocean and just be there gazing at the blue, immersed in the movement and the sound of the waves, feel the ground. I remember when I was in the north of Finland last June, very close to the North Pole. In the summer there's no night. The sun just keep going, soft, never too high, never too strong. The midnight-sun light. A natural dimmed light, so warm, so gentle...

strangers in the city

This week I was asking myself, and my boyfriend, and my friends, and everyone, "should I stay or should I go". I arrived in Philadelphia exactly 3 months ago. Now I have to write a report about my work here, decide if I want to stay longer in order to get my grant extended. It's not an easy choice when we are strangers in the city. Particularly when we are even more strangers in our home town than in any other city. Strange this feeling of being displaced. Maybe nowadays we are all strangers in every city of this globalized world, nomads without roots, connected by mobile technology, always connected, always so distant. It's not easy to leave people and places behind. To leave the complexity of things that constructed our identity. And what is that ? What world is this made of inner and outer worlds, feelings, sensations, perceptions, languages, gestures and places...? We live in the mobile emotions age. Emotional landscapes. Uncontrolled, wild, provocative. What's the past ? What's the future ? What about NOW ? This week I was thinking about the difference between immigration and exile. When our country doesn't give us the possibility to stay, when we feel obliged to go abroad in order to survive, to create, to live a more complete life. What happen to our inner feelings ? What can I do with them ?

As a creative person, I always try to put my pains, my thoughts, my perceptions in my life and in my work. Today I started to read the text of Krzysztof Wodiczko and the words were talking directly to me. He talks about the city to come, the non-place, the present time, the acceptance of the personnel experience as a stranger and he talk about the "THIRD-ZONE", a zone of creation, of infusion, of crossing the boundaries. "Where are you from ?" should never replace "In what way can your past and present experience contribute to everybody's well-being today and tomorrow ?"

All this thoughts and some walks in the city created in me the will to ACT, here and now, to performe, as a complete human being, with body and soul. Performe in a public space of this new city, in downtown -- where the movement doesn't stop I want to introduce stillness.
How much can a body/mind stop and relax and reconnect with one's inner emotions and tactile feelings in the middle of the hectic city ? I am also a Shiatsu Masseuse, a Japanese technique which treats the human being in a holistic and integrative way.

The idea for my performance (i'll call it "the third zone") is to offer a 5 minute massage to people who wants to stop and feel. In other cultures this is a natural thing. The touch, the human contact, the need to be part of... How will people react ? and I want to film it, to take photos: the peaceful face, my hands, the smile... against a background of urban street movement.

to be continued next week...